UGH! Will the dental NIGHTMARE ever end? CAVITIES GALORE!

73 Responses for "UGH! Will the dental NIGHTMARE ever end? CAVITIES GALORE!"

1. tammy b January 22nd, 2008 at 5:12 pm 1

   {{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}
   you.
   are.
   NOT.
   a.
   bad.
   mommy.

2. Shannon Erskine January 22nd, 2008 at 5:18 pm 2

   Hey Lauren-

   Sorry to hear about Noah but dont be so hard on yourself. We hardly ever have candy in the house and my 5 yr old had a cavity too. Even if you are not giving him candy he will get it anyway!LOL! My kids hide candy b/c they know I throw it away and my kids come home from school like everyday with candy from the treat box at school! The school gives my kids way more candy than I ever would!!

   There are worse things you could be doing as a Mom than giving your kids a couple pieces of candy for acting like they are supposed to! At the end of the day you are his Mom and you had to do what you needed to keep your kids happy and you sane!LOL! We are far from perfect and every mothers situation is different I think you are a wonderful mother with alot more patience than I have with my 3 sometimes! Chin up girly!

3. Elizebeth January 22nd, 2008 at 5:18 pm 3

   Ok, first you need to give yourself a break. You did the best you knew how and what worked for your family, as far as bribes and stuff. Plus all the chaos you go through with illness, it isnt fair to put yourself down so much.

   Good for Amber that she has good teeth. And that Alexa did so well. Noah will recover and hopefully wont have the same issues anymore.

   We also had to give up the juice with Ava after her dentist visit. The dentist reccomended once a day and for a brief time. So she gets a tiny glass at dinner now, and you would think it is liquid gold!

   Try to not beat yourself up too much. Teeth can be fixed.

   Now go play with your cute dog and make something pretty!

4. Kathie Tice (aka chattiekathie) January 22nd, 2008 at 5:33 pm 4

   Oh, Lauren, you know that I have been on that guilt trip, don’t you? You are not a bad mother, nor am I, lol! I am STILL brushing my 8 year old’s teeth! And you know what he has to look forward to! Cheer up – you’re in good company!

5. Linda January 22nd, 2008 at 5:34 pm 5

   Lauren,
   Stop beating yourself up. If this country had national health parents wouldn’t have to choose between health care and heat. Some children are just prone to cavities no matter what they eat. He will survive his root canal. All he needs is a Mom’s love to see him through it. With the nitrous oxide he will have no pain and more importantly no memory of it. You have more than enough to deal with give yourself a break.
   Linda

6. Beatrice January 22nd, 2008 at 5:38 pm 6

   Sorry to hear about your woes with your kids! It’s not necessarily the candy and the juice that gave your kid cavities. Some people are just born with weak teeth. My daughter Laura had a brand new tooth and had to get it covered, because it was all uneven and soft. I think it is so unfair that the insurance doesn’t cover for the kids teeth. Hope everything goes well in two weeks. Take care, Beatrice

7. Sue Plote January 22nd, 2008 at 5:42 pm 7

   Lauren – Ditto to the comments in the previous posts. I read your blog often, and I am genuinely amazed by your love for and dedication to your children. Cavities come and can go, but awesome parenting is forever.
   You will be there to help Noah through his treatment, and that’s what he will remember!

8. Shannan Teubner January 22nd, 2008 at 5:47 pm 8

   Breathe.
   You are a great mom.
   Belive me, it could be sooo much worse. I don’t know if that helps, but it does.

9. Shannan Teubner January 22nd, 2008 at 5:48 pm 9

   Sorry I meant to say:
   I don’t know if that helps, but it could.

10. Julie Campbell January 22nd, 2008 at 6:04 pm 10

    Ok… let me make you feel better. 🙂 I am a pediatric OR nurse, so I see kids almost every day that need dental work. People probably don’t realize it, but a lot of kids have such decay that they have to be under a general anesthetic to get restorations. I see kids that have 18 out of 20 teeth that are SO decayed that they are often times not even savable. So — there are 3 year olds that have only 2 teeth left in their mouth until their permanent teeth come in. They make a prosthesis for them, but many of these families don’t/can’t keep them in place. So… when I hear 5 cavities… it’s not ideal, but it’s really not that bad! I don’t know how old your son is, but sippy cups with juice OR milk are terrible for teeth. A lot of parents don’t realize that milk (being sipped throughout the day and not only at meal times) can cause just as many problems as candy or juice. You really have to be careful. One of our rules at home is NOTHING other than water after we brush our teeth in the evening. 🙂 Hang in there! You’re a great mom!

11. KAT Paper Crafts January 22nd, 2008 at 6:24 pm 11

    cavities don’t make you a bad mom…. if they did my mom would be worst!! haha. i have always had cavities until recently, when i was little my brother and i would go to the dentist. we ate the same foods (healthy or junky) and drank the same juices and all that. i brushed my teeth, and he might have as much as me, maybe less. and i had all the cavities and he had none. sometimes its the medicines that you take that wear off the enamel, sometimes you just have those type of teeth. either way, it isnt your fault!!

    and agreed…only water before bedtime… i’ve heard from numerous sources that if your kids drink milk or juice before bed it sits in their mouth and will cause problems with their teeth.

12. diane mcvey January 22nd, 2008 at 6:28 pm 12

    I hope Julie’s comment made you feel better! What she said is absolutely true…it COULD be so much worse! And for many different reasons. You are a GREAT Mom, and don’t you forget it!!!!! You don’t have to be so hard on yourself….and you DO brush their teeth every day; so that is a big plus!
    Just remember that no parent is perfect, and even if one were, something would STILL go wrong! I promise! It has to do with the bacteria in the mouth, and so many reasons that one person gets more cavities than another…heredity, etc…it is NOT your fault!!!
    So take some deep breaths, cry if you will feel better, and then move on to making something beautiful for us to see! You are an amazing person, and we all love you and your family! Even though it’s from afar!!! 😀

13. Bee January 22nd, 2008 at 6:33 pm 13

    Should you have taken your kids earlier to the dentist? Yes! would it have made a big difference? Not necessarilly!!

    Let me tell you about us: I take my kids to the dentist every 6 months, and we brush teeth twice a day. Still, last time we went for a cleaning and Naomi finally had X-rays they found 4 cavities!! Yes 4! The poor kid is like me, she gets cavities bertween teeth!! So we didn’t see them before! Did it make me feel bad, yes you bet! 🙁
    She had to go there twice, do 2 cavities at a time with the whole chebang -> nitrous gas & anesthetic shots… Not fun, but she survived….

    I have pretty much every single one of my teeth with a filling or crown or something, and as a kid no candies in the house and no soda, we only drank water!… Some people just don’t have good teeth.

    Don’t beat yourself up about the past. If anything just be thorough with their future 6 months check-ups.
    It will be OK. 🙂

    (((Hugs)))♥

14. Michelle January 22nd, 2008 at 6:38 pm 14

    Really Lauren…it’s OK. You are not a horrible Mommy in any way, shape or form (hope that makes sense!)

    My almost 8 year old daughter has gotten I believe 5 or 6 fillings now. She goes to the dentist regularly…every 6 months, WE brush her teeth, yes, still & floss them also twice sometimes three times a day…so that alone should show you that you ARE NOT to blame. That’s just the way it is, it doesn’t matter how good you take care of your teeth (kid’s or adults), some just have “bad teeth”. My hubby is the same damn way & he takes really good care of his teeth.

    So it’s OK Lauren – don’t feel bad, & if you have a good dentist Noah will pull thru just fine.

    Hugz

15. msscmoore January 22nd, 2008 at 6:39 pm 15

    Don’t beat yourself up….some kids are just prone to have more cavities than others. My kids get diluted juice and very little if any candy at all and still had cavities.

    With all you’ve been through, you are still SUPERMOM in my book!!!

16. MichelleS January 22nd, 2008 at 6:53 pm 16

    Don’t be so hard on yourself. You give all three the same juice and candy right? And all three had different results. Some kids are more prone to cavities, at least that is what I believe. I have a friend who gives her kids tons of fruit snacks, milk, pop, candy and everything else that is bad and her kid is 8 and has yet to have one cavity. Then I have another friend who gave her kids minimal sugary snacks and guess what? She was 5 and needed a root canal and fillings and all kinds of stuff. You just never know. Now that you know Noah is more prone..you will do things differently. You are putting Noah before yourself and that sounds like a great Mom to me. Take a deep breath, give Noah a hug and then GO STAMP away the guilt.

17. Barb barton January 22nd, 2008 at 6:54 pm 17

    Oh Lauren – you are a wonderful, loving, caring mother. Do not beat yourself up over this. Some kids are just more prone to this than others. If he has soft teeth, it can contribute to it also!! (My older brother has super hard teeth and not a cavity in his mouth, and my teeth are so soft and well, we just won’t even got there!!!LOL!!!)
    Noah may suprise you and come through this with no problems!!! Alot of it depends on the dentist and how they are with kids. And by the sounds of it, you have a fantastic dentist now!!! Big Hugs!!!!

18. tylersmum05 January 22nd, 2008 at 6:57 pm 18

    Lauren, Cut yourself some slack. If you never brushed Noah’s teeth then you could be beating yourself up with reason. There is only so much you can do and you have done it. Some kids/people are just more prone to cavities than others. I used to work for a dentist and you wouldnt believe the kids I have seen come into the office with decay. Some with very major decay and much younger than Noah. And you wouldnt believe how brave some of those same kids can be. Noah will be a trooper and this will soon be all a distant memory. Keep your chin up, you are doing a great job. I can tell just by the way you write about your kids, that they (ok, and Daisy) are your world and you would do anything for them. Chin Up -Molly B

19. Dawn E. January 22nd, 2008 at 6:58 pm 19

    Oh my goodness girl! You think you are the only parent that has gone through this??? haha! You are NOT alone! Chloe is like Alexa in that she has no enamel on her teeth…or very little. Last year we had her put under and she got EIGHT caps put on her teeth. ALL of them baby teeth tooth…lol BUT it would save those teeth as they’d be there for another 4 years or so. One tooth did have a cavity already and she had some root repair done. Now when her permanant teeth come in they put a sealant on them to protecy them.
    Hope the kids make out okay getting fixed up! They are stronger than we think 😉

20. Connie Jean January 22nd, 2008 at 7:41 pm 20

    Hi. You don’t know me… but I have you in my google reader and like to peruse your blog on occasion. I just wanted to give you a virtual hug here…

    I know where you are coming from. I had absolutely HORRID teeth… so bad that eventually after having two kids it became necessary to get mine removed. (yeah, I just admitted that in the cyber world)… I was 23 yrs old at the time. My two kids are 6 & 4 … the four year old’s teeth are great. However, my girl, the 6 yr old… has HORRIBLE teeth. She’s had five cavities filled and will need to go and have a molar removed (baby tooth) before it ends up infecting the rest of her mouth. It’s so sad to see her suffer with issues such as I had… and I thought I must be a horrible Momma… but I know I’m not… and I know you aren’t as well. Hang in there and just know you are not alone. I’m sure it was a huge disappointment seeing one of your babies suffering with dental problems. Hopefully they will get fixed and then things will get better. I’ll keep you all in my thoughts. Huggs! ~Connie

21. Victoria January 22nd, 2008 at 7:47 pm 21

    Our story is like others who have posted here. We did everything right, brushed for her, took her to the dentist every 6 months… she doesn’t even like candy and voila 6 cavities, between her baby teeth because they touch and we weren’t flossing enough. I didn’t know 4-5 year olds needed to floss but now I know! Everyone comments on her beautiful smile because she has none of the baby teeth gaps…I wish she had those gaps! General anesthesia in the OR for baby teeth! She has a strong gag reflex and has thrown up twice during teeth cleaning so that the the best way for us. I was more than a little nervous. But now all is well, no juice, milk at meals then brush and floss and Act. The thing is we already know she will need braces because there wont be enough room in there for all her adult teeth!

    Anyway we all just keep on doing our best and love them tons…what else can parents do!

22. Sharon Batchelor January 22nd, 2008 at 7:50 pm 22

    Lauren just take a few big breaths – you are not a Bad Mommy, you are a GREAT MOMMY. So Noah has a few cavities, it’s fixable, expensive but so are most things. All children have different responses to what we give them to eat and drink and some will get cavities and some won’t. All you can do is your best and I think you do that every single day of your life. Noah will be fine. Amber is the lucky one. My boys had all of their permanent teeth sealed as they came in and apart from some problems with wisdom teeth have had no other trouble.

    Hope Alexa’s next chemo goes well. And, you just remember to be nice to yourself, you’re doing a great job under very trying circumstances!!

    Hugs,

    Sharon

23. cyndi January 22nd, 2008 at 7:58 pm 23

    honey its ok. I have a three year old who is getting two crowns on her teeth because she has defective enamel on them! I understand expensive. We all do the best we can with what we have on our plates and just the fact that you feel like a bad mother means you are NOT one!
    hugs!
    xxooxxo
    cyndi

24. Bonnie aka raduse January 22nd, 2008 at 7:59 pm 24

    First, don’t beat yourself up over Noah’s teeth. You did what you had to do. Second, you are an excellent mom. The dentist could be right and bacteria just likes Noah’s mouth.

25. Susan Hall January 22nd, 2008 at 8:11 pm 25

    Some kids have better teeth than others. It genitics,so do not beat yourself up.You are a good mom. Oh by the way I took your advice and went to micheals and bought all the decorative accents they had in all the colors they had. Did it on my lunch break. even went next door to target and hit there dollar spot. Susan

26. Health Insurance » UGH! Will the dental NIGHTMARE ever end? CAVITIES GALORE! January 22nd, 2008 at 8:21 pm 26

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27. Dawn k January 22nd, 2008 at 8:33 pm 27

    Lauren, I am a dental hygienist and have seen it all. I worked for a pediatric dentist for 10 years. there are a lot of factors that go into someone getting cavities. I have seen 3 kids from the same family, all same diet, and only one gets cavities! It’s a combo of brushing, diet, and genetics. The important thing is that you took them to the dentist, and you are taking steps to fix what needs fixing. Make the changes at home, and prevent future cavities. Go out and get a fluoride rinse, ACT is the most common one and have them use it every night before bed(just make sure they don’t swallow it). Watch anything sticky and sweet, those are teeth’s worst enemies. Cavities in baby teeth progress 100 times faster than in adult teeth. So small cavities turn big fast. The nitrous will help him relax. It works great on kids. it doesn’t have to be a bad experience. If you are stressed about it, he will be too. With all that you have been through with your daughter, I am surprised that you do all you do. give yourself a break. we can’t be superwomen all the time.

28. Mary D January 22nd, 2008 at 8:53 pm 28

    Oh Lauren, please don’t be so hard on yourself. My husband is a retired pediatric dentist. You take care of your children’s teeth. You brought them to the dentist at the first sign that something might be wrong. Congratulations to you! You did not wait until every single tooth in their heads was rotten and they were crying night and day. You are a supermom to me. ((((((((Hugs))))))))))))

29. Angelina Leonard January 22nd, 2008 at 9:07 pm 29

    Stop it already, you are starting to scare me. My 5 yo hasn’t been in about 2 yrs. and I don’t have any excuse. My dh is gonna kill me if he has a cavity. My 3 yo hasn’t even been. So you will still win Mother of the Year award in my opinion. So calm down and think of all the things you do right.

30. Tracey aka cuccicoo1002 January 22nd, 2008 at 9:15 pm 30

    {{{HUGS}}} I’ll say what everyone else has…don’t beat yourself up!! Some people are just more prone to cavaties and the like…yes, you have some guilt, but he may not have had any juice or any candy and still had 5 cavaties… 😉 You’re a great mommy, and everything will be just fine. 🙂

31. kim January 22nd, 2008 at 9:18 pm 31

    Lauren you are being way too hard on yourself! Your kids are quite lucky to have you, cavities and all!
    Hugs,
    Kim

32. Bobbie January 22nd, 2008 at 9:24 pm 32

    Goodness girlfriend, it isn’t the end of the world… well maybe for buying stamping goodies, but it will be worth it.

    I didn’t go to the dentist for 3 yrs and had EIGHT (yes I said 8) all in between my teeth! I am ever thankful that I’ve never had to have a root canal OR a veneer OR a crown… yikes!

    So, be happy that you can at least change your habits and learn from your mistakes! Change to candy to stickers or a trip to the $ store or give him money for his bank. I bribed lgirl w/m&ms and jelly beans (while potty training) but for the most part she doesn’t get much candy.

    So change your habits now and you will learn and grow. No need to stress and don’t feel bad. You aren’t a bad parent, you just made unwise choices that can now be changed!

    GOT IT??!!

    Hugs to ya!

    Bobbie *Ü*

33. Dee January 22nd, 2008 at 9:26 pm 33

    As everyone else has told you…stop blaming yourself.
    You are a Very Good MOM !!
    I totally know how you feel…because I was petrified of
    the dentist myself..I didn’t take mine,like I should have.
    Now, that they are grown…they go like they should.
    Hopefully, I did not pass on that fear to them.
    Keep your chin up girl!!

34. Lora January 22nd, 2008 at 9:33 pm 34

    Whoa!! Take a nice deep breath and re-read the I will have no guilt post. You have nothing to feel guilty about. Amber and Alexa made it though good, Noah will be fine. You will be there to make sure he doesn’t suffer the anxieties that you have gone through. Children are each made from their own unique mold and some will have problems with their teeth and others won’t no matter what. They’ll be fine and so will you, that’s a promise. 😉

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36. Linda S. January 22nd, 2008 at 10:08 pm 36

    Do not be so hard on yourself, you are not alone. When I took my daughter last fall, she has not 5, but 7 cavities!!!!! Two of them are root canals-all on baby teeth. I started crying in the dentist’s office, I couldn’t help it. I feel your guilt, and the bomb of how much it will cost. We’re looking at about $3000, yes you read that right, for baby teeth. I about fainted, started freaking out. Pediatric Dentist are always more expensive.

    Hopefully, it won’t be a horrible experience for your child. I was very worried about how my daughter would do, b/c she had had a horrible experience with the first dentist we went to. I literally had her on top of me and I was holding her down while he worked. I was crying, she was crying, and I’ve never felt worse. But, this time around was wonderful. She didn’t even flinch when they gave her the numbing shot!

    So, have faith, he’ll pull through.

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38. Heather Leech January 22nd, 2008 at 10:15 pm 38

    Hi Lauren!
    I am normally a lurker (and LOVE your blog!) but I had to chime in on this one! My brother and I were both adopted and were very different in many ways…including our teeth. He never took care of his teeth, hated the dentist and didn’t go nearly as frequently as I did. I really tried to take care of my teeth. My brother must have had enamel as strong as steel ’cause he never had cavities. Me, on the other hand, a mouth full. I think I had 8 one time (although I’m not totally sure ’cause it was so long ago). Although I loved my sweets and he didn’t…but I always thought it wasn’t fair!
    Also, about taking the kids to the dentist and stuff, I can totally relate. My son had a mild form of autism and had chipped all of his front teeth before the age of 2 (he was walking at 8.5 mo.) We had to have him put under a general anesthetic and have a ton of work done shortly after his 2nd birthday. I remember the dentist giving us the ‘you’re a bad parent because you did this to your son’ speech and I was devastated thinking I was the worst mom on the planet (we didn’t know about the autism then…all we knew was that we had a VERY difficult baby and we did what we had to do to get by). Then my daughter comes along who has teeth like me and we go through the same routine with the general anesthetic to get a ton of work done (although, this time at an awesome pediatric dental clinic that didn’t make me feel like a pile of poop!) I brushed her teeth every morning and night. I was so careful about juice etc. I did everything I could and she still had cavities.
    Anyways….I really hope everything goes well I know everyone is saying the same thing, but you’re doing an AWESOME job with your kids…don’t let this get ya’ down!!
    {hugs}
    Heather L.

39. Jen January 22nd, 2008 at 10:24 pm 39

    Your so not alone. It took me FOREVER to take my oldest son to the dentist. I just hate the dentist (and so does hubby). He was …. um… 7 before I took him. Bad mom, I know. He had all kinds of work done. Luckily we have double coverage so it wasn’t that expensive, but I was feeling so guilty. My youngest went too at 4 and had no problems. Now they go regularly. But after ALOT of work for my oldest and lots of guilt from me.. and I don’t even have an excuse. So I get it.

    Now that they are going it will all come together and they will fix the issues and you’ll just maintain from there. But I do agree that it’s not really the candy or juice. My oldest has really ridged teeth and has more issues and my youngest hasn’t had one cavity. It’s the luck of the draw. Now my youngest hit his tooth on the bed and it’s not looking good.. so we are going next week. Fun fun!

    Hang in there girl!!! Your not alone and your a GREAT mom!

40. theresa v January 22nd, 2008 at 10:31 pm 40

    I’ll echo everyone’s sentiments. I have pretty bad teeth with lots of cavities. They are caused by a bacteria not bad parenting.

    Also, I’m sure the dentist will work out a payment plan with you. If not, find a new dentist.

    You WILL get through this.

41. Linda January 22nd, 2008 at 10:33 pm 41

    don’t fret…it’s probably not your fault at all! when i was a kid i brushed my teeth endlessly, rarely ate candy or drank soft drinks…my brother on the other hand, ate candy until there was no tomorrow…NEVER brushed…and when we went to the dentist he had a clean bill and i came out with no less than 3 cavaties. try and make sense of that!

42. Rachel Hope January 22nd, 2008 at 10:36 pm 42

    I am SO sorry you had to deal with this! However, do NOT i repeat NOT feel bad about your parenting!!! My son got My bad teeth, and although we brush and Floss Everyday I took him for his 2nd visit to the dentist 6 months ago only to be told her had 13 (yes, I said 13) Teeth to fix…not 13 cavities, 13 TEETH, multiple cavities in some teeth!!!! We had to take him to the Hospital and give him General Anesthesia!!!!! My dentist says he has Super weak enamel….This after I ate and drank Everythign I was supposed to and Npthing I was not supposed to while I was Preggers….

    Anyway, those are my woes, not yours, but just so you know….teeth are what they will be, and you know and I know that we are doing the best we can.

    {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}}}]

43. Laura Sneden January 22nd, 2008 at 10:37 pm 43

    Lauren, (((hugs))) I’m so sorry. Everyone is right. You are an awesome mom. A crappy mom wouldn’t feel so guilty. He’ll be fine. He probably does just have more bacteris in his mouth.

    I took Caleb to the dentist a little over a week ago – 4 cavities. Crummy enamel. I feel your pain. It does cost a fortune, and I felt like crapola. You know what – Caleb was fine. I was way more scarred by it than he was. We do the best we can. Hang in there. You are a great mom.

44. mj albright January 23rd, 2008 at 12:07 am 44

    HUGS girl.
    You are feeling the way caring moms feel right now. We are always hard on ourselves when it comes to our babes.

    When I took my little guy to the dentist (he had to start going at 1 yo. due to having ulcers on the tip of his tongue from his teeth and his pediatrician said it was a dentist issue). My pediatric dentist stated and it has stuck with me, “I’m a dentist with two sons. One who had no cavities and one who had a mouth full”. He did the same care (brushing rituals) for both of his sons. He said, “some people are just more prone”. So, I kinda believe him…I have a daughter with all sorts of crowns, fillings, and sealants to the back molars. I have a son with nothing SO FAR (he’s a junk food eater so it’s only a matter of time). I hope this helps some 🙂

    You make me want to cry. Wish I could help ya. YOU’RE AN AWESOME MOM IN MY BOOK 🙂

45. Krystie Lee January 23rd, 2008 at 12:08 am 45

    There are sooo many opportunities to feel guilty about as a parent, nobody warns you about all the guilt! You’re an awesome mommy, don’t beat yourself up about it.

46. Lorie January 23rd, 2008 at 12:55 am 46

    Girlfriend…do NOT feel bad! We all do with what we have at the time. Noah will NOT hate the dentist for ever unless your dentist totally sucks and doesn’t sedate him appropriately! As far as Alexa…DO NOT let them veneer that tooth until they know for sure that she does NOT have a cavity in that tooth as veneering it with a cavity will cause MANY problems after the fact. Bad teeth are not your fault so please quit blaming yourself. Of our three boys…2 have no cavities and one has had mouthful…go figure! Many hugs to you!!!

47. ~liz January 23rd, 2008 at 1:29 am 47

    I don’t understand if it’s his baby teeth and he is going to lose them anyway right? Then why don’t you just wait until they fall out? I’m sorry I just think dentists are the BIGGEST crooks highway robbers around. IMHO and I am no doctor if cosmetically he is ok, if he is not having any pain and there is no fear of infection…. you me? I’d let them go until they fell out. Sorry never heard of a child root canal sounds like cha-ching cash register to me. Shame on THEM for making you freaked out. Dental problems are the WORST. OMG I just had my wisdom teeth out and now one of my $3000 implants is damaged and I still need to go back to the surgeon to get assessed. I’ll tell you what if my implant is bad I am going to scream. It is brand new they should have know how to avoid damaging it in surgery. I am waiting to get it fixed until my dh insurance kicks in and even then it is only 40% coverage. I don’t trust them sorry I just don’t. I think common sense has been thrown out the window replaced with greed (on the dentists part) well wishes sorry dentists make me crabby tooo

48. Alana January 23rd, 2008 at 1:44 am 48

    Lauren! You are a great mother…I can tell by the way you talk about your kiddos. Stressful situations hit and you do the best with what you have, which you did. Think of it this way…you’re not a bad mom because he has 5 cavities, you’re a good mom because you are getting his teeth taken care of!

    *********hugs*********

49. Shelly P. January 23rd, 2008 at 5:11 am 49

    Don’t blame yourself! My daughter had to have a root canal when she was around 8 and she had to have two teeth pulled and spacers put in for two years until the permanent teeth grew in….all thanks to gummy little fruit snacks! Needless to say, my kids only get them once and a great while!! And we a fanatics about them brushing too. Hang in there!

50. Cleaning » Blog Archive » UGH! Will the dental NIGHTMARE ever end? CAVITIES GALORE! January 23rd, 2008 at 5:28 am 50

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51. Cris A January 23rd, 2008 at 7:25 am 51

    I hope you feel better after reading about all the other “horrible” Moms out there! My youngest was the same way, his poor baby teeth were just rotten!! We couldn’t wait for them to fall out! It was all because of the juice in his sippy cup that he needed to fall asleep with. Even though we also brushed twice a day it still got him! Oh well…the baby teeth are gone now and his next set is healthy. He hates the dentist, so the experience makes him brush better. Hang in there, your not alone!!

52. Angela January 23rd, 2008 at 8:10 am 52

    I just retired as a 26 veteran dental assistant. Believe me I’ve seen it all too! The good thing is that you are on the right track now! Please start the ACT regiment as Dawn K. suggested. I can tell you that a pulpectomy (Root Canal) on a kid is nothing like a root canal on an adult. If you have a great dental team and a semi cooperative kid it will go quickly!! One thing NOT to do is give any negative vibes about the proceedure to your child. Positive attitudes help us dental folk a ton!! Most kids honestly go out not dreading to come back at all. Hope this makes you feel a little more positive about what is to come. Good luck!!!

53. Renee V. (happystamper05) January 23rd, 2008 at 8:37 am 53

    You know, if I was right there with you….. I’d give you a big ‘ole hug.

    Teeth. Ugh!

    I’ve had my tales and woes with my own teeth and that of my kiddies.

    Here’s my experiences (condensed version)…
    -My mom had very soft teeth, lots of cavities, ended up just getting dentures in her 50’s.
    -I have soft enamel and am prone to cavities – lots of them (remember I’ve had like 10 root canals already…) I’m the only one out of four kids with teeth like this.
    -My DD is the same way…soft enamal – lots of cavities. My DS – nothing. I think he’s had only one or two cavities in his life. Oh, and here’s the kicker. My DD does everything right… brushes, floss, and rinses with flouride (Act). My DS does brush his teeth (sometimes forgets), randomly flosses and hardly ever rinses. My DD gets so angry when she gets all the cavities and he doesn’t get any.

    You’re not a bad mommy – you just have a kid with soft teeth. 🙂

    Big prayers for Alexa tomorrow with her chemo.

    HUGS,
    Renee

54. Kathy Tabbers January 23rd, 2008 at 9:58 am 54

    Lauren,

    Sorry to hear you are so upset. Please stop beating yourself up. You are a great mom! Look at how much love those kids have in their life. Not all mothers love their kids the way you do.

    Forgive yourself and move on. Have a great day!

    ~Kathy

55. eileen January 23rd, 2008 at 10:02 am 55

    Lauren:

    You can stop beating yourself up…….some kids are just prone to needing lots of dental care and no matter how much you do, it’s not going to prevent everything. I have six children…the first 5 never to this day…the oldest being 21….have ever had a cavity. My last one, who is 8, has already had a baby root canal with a silver cap put on the tooth and two other cavities. My regular dentist, sent me to a pediatric dentist to have the work done, and that dentist tried to tell me that seeing how she was the youngest of six that I was probably lax with her dental care. Well, let me tell you…..he got an ear full from me!!! I had rotten teeth as a child and i’m still having tons of dental work all the time regardless of the fact that I am impeciable with my dental routine. Unfortunely for my little one, she got my horrible teeth genes!!!!
    You’re a great Mom, so don’t let this get to you. Good luck with Alexa…will keep you all in my prayers.
    Keep smiling!!!!
    eileen

56. Bev Breisinger January 23rd, 2008 at 10:12 am 56

    Girlfriend, it’s not YOU!! It’s all in the genes! I’ve come to that conclusion. Fatness is even in your genes! You can’t control it! I’m fat, I don’t eat like a cow – so what’s up with that?? Teeth on the other hand, I’m forty-something, going on forty-something plus one soon and NO CAVITIES!!! Can you believe it?? Brush in the morning and floss occasionally. My kids stand at the dentist office waiting to cheer, but are let down when Mom has no cavities!! I didn’t even have a cavity when I was a kid – just braces and too many teeth! My husband, on the other hand, drinks milk like a fiend and we call him metal mouth! I tell the hygentist to make sure she has her sunglasses on when he opens his mouth! Both kids have cavities – I don’t think they drink enough water – mostly juice/pop/milk, etc., but I also think they have their dad’s genes!

    Keep your chin up – these are things that we really can’t control – just one of those things!
    **HUGGS** 🙂
    Bev

57. Jo January 23rd, 2008 at 12:25 pm 57

    I know exactly how you feel. I have two boys and the oldest has never had a cavity however, my youngest (who’s five) was six months late for his check up (because the practice were late sending out the appointments I might add!) and they found three cavities!!! I was devastated because I’m the one responsible for brushing his teeth. However, the Dentist did tell me that obviously diet affects the teeth but to cut out snacking. If you give them sweets or chocolate, give it to them after their meals, so that they are eating their food all in one go. Don’t know if this is any help but please don’t beat yourself up about it!

58. mcbetty January 23rd, 2008 at 1:09 pm 58

    Now, now, Lauren. Take a deep breath.
    This is no indication of good or bad parenting.
    My two grown children came from the same two parents
    and grew up in the same household;
    one has always had cavities, crowns, root canals.
    The other has never had a cavity that I know of.
    Does that mean I parented one child better than the
    other? Absurd question!
    Please don’t pass on your fear and dread to Noah.
    With the nitrous, he won’t remember the procedure —
    at least that’s my understanding.
    Again, take a deep breath, pick up Daisy (proven fact:
    petting an animal lowers your blood pressure),
    hug Noah, and go stamp a fun card.

59. Terri Moore January 23rd, 2008 at 1:27 pm 59

    First off you are not a bad mom. I can understand you being upset about this though. Hopefully my story will make you feel better. I did not go to the dentist for 13 years because of a bad experience I had when I was a kid. I did take my daughter to the dentist for the first time when she was three and she had a mouthful of cavities too. That was mainly because I had never brushed her teeth before that and she was going to bed at night with a bottle full of milk but I have heard that cavities can be caused from a bacteria that we can give them without even knowing it too. Anyways I was still besides myself when I heard this expecially because they wanted to put her under general to fix them. I said no way and keep looking for a dentist that was willing to fix them without doing that and I finally found one. The dentist I found was able to fix all her teeth in the office over time and she never had to have a shot of novicane or was tramatized either and her teeth are fine now. I cannot say enough good things about this dentist. In my opinion I think that most dentists are out to make money off of us these days and we have to be careful let them take advantage of us. If those teeth are not causing Noah pain then I don’t think there is a need for that kind of extensive dental work on them especailly because they are baby teeth that he is going to lose anyways. You need to do what you feel is right though. I hope some of what I said helped you to feel better about this.

60. Staci M. January 23rd, 2008 at 1:46 pm 60

    Lauren! Just reading this. Don’t jump all over yourself! Could be he just got a “bad teeth” gene like Amber got a “good teeth” gene. It happens! The best you can do is to move forward from now…gosh, who is it says “When you know better, you do better”? I think it’s Oprah! Anyway, I was convinced to stop feeding my kids the gummy snacks by the dentist, as I was sure that those were bad for their teeth, so I stopped it when they were about 3. We also don’t drink soda except for maybe once a month (but probably less). So, now you know that Noah’s teeth can’t handle it and you can make a change. You honestly didn’t know before, right??

    I’m really encouraged to here that they did well at the dentist & you were happy with the dentist office & how they related to your kids. That’s a big plus right there!

    Chin up, Girlie! None of us are perfect parents!

61. Lorrie January 23rd, 2008 at 1:48 pm 61

    You have received plenty of advise and by the time you get to my message should realize that you are a terrific Mother, (we can’t do everything perfect!) so I think that right now I’ll just say a small prayer for you, and know that everything will work out. Try and have a nice day!

62. Geny C. January 23rd, 2008 at 1:50 pm 62

    Oh Lauren I feel your pain!!! I have a four and a half year old, he has had 9 cavities filled since I took him to the dentist the first time. I took him at 3 to get his first cleaning and so began our nightmare. He has been wonderful everytime and we have definitely stopped eating gummies! Our dentist said that is the worst food for your teeth. We seriously do brush his teeth too, but I believe some kids are blessed with better genes than others. I have had very minor teeth issues, a few cavities here and there, but my sisters have all had MAJOR issues. We grew up the same, ate the same stuff, it just happens!!!! You are a good parent for getting this taken care of though!!!!
    Good Luck!

63. Tracy Nerat January 23rd, 2008 at 6:25 pm 63

    Lauren,

    Don’t beat yourself up over this, all will be fine. We want everything wonderful for our kids, that’s our nature right?! However, we are just Moms, we can only do our best and leave the rest in the Lords hands. I’d say with the hand you’ve been dealt and the way you handle it, you’re right up there in the “Great Moms” category!

    Both of my kids at age 2-3 had to have 3 hours of dental surgery in a hospital. They had so many dental problems they had to have about half of their teeth capped with silver caps. For 3 years, my daughter and son smiled big silver smiles, my sons small friends thought silver teeth were the coolest, however little girls don’t look cool with silver teeth! I felt terrible for them, neither of my kids had any enamel on their teeth. They get their teeth cleaned every 6 months like clock work, we celebrate if we get the “no cavities this time” report. Over the years they have learned brushing twice a day isn’t enough they have to brush properly, floss, and take flouride tablets. I’m happy to say they doing much better and we are off to a new stage…..braces!

    My daughter always feels much better on our dental trips when she takes a stuffed animal friend along to hold. Our dentist always asks so many questions about her friend that it relaxes her and takes her mind off whats happening.

    God Bless,

    Tracy

64. Mary Jo Price-Williams January 23rd, 2008 at 7:42 pm 64

    You are a parent that does the best that she can — that is the best kind there is! You love your kids and would do anything for them, don’t feel guilty for that! You said the dentist was awesome, I am sure it will be fine. (((((Hugs to you))))))

65. Karen (basketmom on SCS) January 23rd, 2008 at 10:26 pm 65

    Haven’t been to your blog in a few days and just saw this post but had to respond. First of all – you’re a great mom! Just by reading your posts, I know that! 🙂

    Secondly – I brush my kids teeth too but we feed them a ton of candy – mostly because my husband and I have a sweet tooth and we just have it around. I honestly think that “bad teeth” or ones that are more cavity-prone is a heredity thing – seriously – my kids eat it ALL THE TIME and they’ve never had a cavity and to me, that’s astonishing! I am not exaggerating when I say this – my grandparents had an old-fashioned CANDY STORE when I was growing up and they brought me candy every week for YEARS and I’ve only had two cavities in my life! Yes, I brush my teeth, but frankly, I think I just have strong teeth and it’s heredity – my sister has only had a couple cavities in her whole life and we have both been over-exposed to candy and sweets our entire lives.

    Ok – that was way more info than you cared to know, but my point is, sometimes this sort of thing is beyond our control!

    One last thing – we got our kids those new “singing” toothbrushes (Hannah Montana and Smashmouth ones) and each song plays for 2 minutes and my kids totally brush their teeth longer than normal just to hear their songs play all the way through. Pretty cool little item, I think.

66. tanja fussel January 23rd, 2008 at 11:20 pm 66

    HEY!!! A child being diagnosed with Cancer pretty much excuses any transgression or misstep. Heck, getting through the week pretty much qualifies a mom for a bronze star! You’re a great mom! I’m always ashamed of my mom skills when I see the awesome projects you do for your family (parties with themes, puppies, etc.) Pretend that Lauren is a friend of yours, and not you! Do you judge her or give her understanding? Do you assume she always means well and does her best or do you think she just doesn’t care enough? Maybe you could be as understanding a friend to yourself as I’m sure you are to a friend. Or…. maybe you’re exhausted and need a good cry. The kids will all survive their dental trials without too many scars. Unfortunately, we can’t always protect them from everything as I KNOW you KNOW. Sorry – now it’s me rambling. Best wishes to you!

67. Your Mom January 24th, 2008 at 9:53 pm 67

    My daughter,
    I read your blog about the children and the dentist, and literally burst into tears…How could you be so tough on yourself..?????I have told you this many times, and need to tell you once again…you are the most courageous and strongest woman I have ever known…and by far the most loving, caring, attentive mother….I see you like nobody else knows you…..and I have always told you that even if you weren’t my daughter, I would definitely want you for my friend………you always amaze me…you are truly blessed to have all these wonderful ladies respond with care and kindness, and share with you…..Please take all their kind words to heart and hold on to them…because all their words are so true…as good an effort as you put in, sometimes it’s just genes….Noah will take his lead from you…You have your dentist fears…..He’ll come through like a champ…after all he is your son….do you wonder where you get your blabbing from???!!!!! One step forward…never looking back…….Love you…….Mom

68. Kathleen January 25th, 2008 at 4:28 pm 68

    Well, your mom said it all—your son will survive and he will only be in therapy for a little while because of this! ;} Don’t be so hard on yourself—you have had just a few other things on your plate!

69. Charlene H. January 26th, 2008 at 12:52 am 69

    It is so funny to read other mom’s issues when I have had the same issues too! I was also shocked when I took my son to the dentist and found he had cavities. I used to let him fall asleep with his bottle in his mouth and wasn’t really great at the teeth brushing when they were small. I too, felt like the most horrible mom EVER! I was certainly more nervous taking him to get fillings than he was. On our second trip – yes we needed two!, he was laying in the chair and started to fall asleep. I had to keep poking him to wake up so he could keep his mouth open. I was so scared when they put the freezing in but he didn’t even flinch. A few years later the two teeth that had fillings both broke and he had to get them pulled – again no problem for him. Then they said they would have to put a “spacer” in so there would be room for the permanent teeth to come in. I felt so bad and then I asked how long he would have to wear the spacer they said he should get those teeth when he was 10-11. That was at least 4-6 years with that thing! Luckily his teeth have come up before they are supposed to and he got them out at 8 years. I don’t know why but he loves the dentist. She is absolutely wonderful. He gets really mad when they say he doesn’t have to come back for another year! He would go once a month if he could.

    You have to make sure you have a great dental team and it sounds like you do. So don’t worry, just make sure you are there to hold his hand and you will both be fine – well he probably will be – I am not too sure about the mom part (hee hee). This is always harder on the moms.

70. Mary January 27th, 2008 at 1:21 am 70

    I read your blog intermittently, and you are obviously a devoted, loving mother and a strong, courageous woman. With the really big medical crises you have to deal with on an ongoing basis, you must put the dental problems in perspective. Not everything that happens to our children is our fault even though “mommy guilt” is inherent in every good mother.
    Also, a bad dental check-up is not necessarily reflective of dental hygiene. My husband must have a crown replaced due to a cavity, our 27 year old son must have a new crown (yes, we still pay his dental bills), and I have to see my orthodontist for misalignment – again – after wearing braces in my thirties! All of these dental problems in one month and I assure you that each of us brush and floss without fail, and our son doesn’t even like sweets.
    My point is: no one is to blame – not my husband, our son, me, and especially NOT YOU. So stop feeling guilty and save that emotional energy for the more important and demanding aspects of your life.
    Hugs,
    -mary
    PS: Just read the comment from your Mom – wow. You are one lucky girl to have a Mom like that.

71. Shawn January 27th, 2008 at 1:51 pm 71

    Hi,
    I am new to your blog.. which I am loving by the way.. but I am dental hygienist too.. DO NOT BEAT YOURSELF UP over this.. it happens. Let it go.. one thing I might reccomend is for them to put a composite veneer on the front tooth for now.. wait on a “permanent” one.. she will grow, and from experience, you will need to have it changed.. this will save a lot of $$..
    Try an over the counter fluoride rince for them at night.. and again.. it’s over and done with.. take a breath and promise to do better.. Life is too short to be that worried about it.. I am sure that your dentist will agree.. and they do understand about what is happening in your family.. and if they don’t.. find a new one fast!
    good luck

72. Dawn January 27th, 2008 at 7:53 pm 72

    I just found your blot. It is so pretty, your work is just fab. I am glad I found it.

    I am a dental assistan, and I deal with a lot of kids. I want to say that your not a bad mom, I noticed a few people said they are baby teeth so let them go.

    Just know that letting them go is bad. They can affect the adult teeth and they can get infections. So, please get them takin care of.

    and a “root canal” on a child is sooooo easy compared to an adult. THe babe won’t even know. I must say that a lot of kids get cavities, so don’t beat yourself up.

    get a rinse like the hygen….said above, and I would try to go ahead and bush for them at least every other day to “help out”. Limit, juice and other sugary drinks. I see a ton of cavities from kids and teenagers who don’t eat a lot of candy, but drink sports and vitamin drinks…they have a ton of sugar so be aware of that.

    Good luck. If you have any questions..please please please email me. I would anwser any thing I can.

    dawn…

73. Kari February 20th, 2008 at 2:52 am 73

    I came and found this post because I remembered it when I took my not yet 2 year old to the dentist today! He has an extra tooth, but it is in a position where it is up against the gap between his top front 2 teeth on the right, and that makes it sooo hard to brush (let alone the fact that he hates us doing it anyway!)
    Well, of course he has a cavity in the 2nd tooth doesn’t he! So when he has a GA to have the extra tooth pulled out in a months time, he will also have a filling done – all at the ripe old age of 23months!! The dentist was fantastic and told me not to worry, that she understood I couldn’t get the brush in there, but it still makes me feel like a bad mummy! A filling before he’s 2! He only drinks water or milk and has not had lollies or chocolate so far and we try to keep his diet low sugar, but there is still a cavity. Fingers crossed that will be the only one he ever needs (who am I kidding!!!)
    So, what I wanted to say other than blurt all that about my baby, is that sometimes cavities happen to good people! You can do the only right thing as much as you can and try as hard as you can, but sometimes higher powers work against us. Unfortunately for you, that seems to be WAY too often, but hopefully there are plusses along the way to balance out some of these stressful and guilty moments! And also big THANKYOU for putting your story out here for all us mums to read and realise we are not the only ones whose kids have cavities!!